Hidden Testimony

I have been through a lot of lies in my life
lies that i kept hiding so others won't see..
I've established a name so others can look up at me..
but i am not what they think i am..
i am just a weak, inept, lonesome person, concealing the real me
behind the shadow of that someone they used to know.
people are blinded by my laughs.. by my jokes..by my silly moves

they never realized...

loneliness deep w/n my eyes have been covered by the good delivery of my acts.
others have been tricked by the smooth gestures i show..

and there, the faint light of discovery once again vanishes in thin air..

i've been searching for answers to all my confussions and questions..
I've been wanting to end all doubts in my mind.
but the knowledge acquired from mortal intelligence
has always been useless..

i am a nobody..
i am trapped on this sinking sand.. every move i make nails me deeper..
my soul is in deep agony..
the torturous reality sores my entire personality..
there's nothing left for me to keep moving on.. nothing else but my heart..
my broken and bruised heart..
I have a lot more love to give,
more than willing to share..
but noone seems to want it.. a very sad reality..

twice i have tried.. twice i have failed
now this heart is once again been swept away..
i cannot promise you that i will be the best,
but i can love you the way i am supposed to
I will love you in the best way i know..
and in the best possible way i can