My Valentine Intricacy

I'm not really good at picking out gifts, don't have a creative mind to come up with any ideas for special occassions. February, month of love, my mind is whirling badly anxious of what I can possibly do or give to my other half (especially she's miles away).

Nuninuninu.. "too late to make a personalized valentine card, it's a shame if she ends up receiving it on Easter.." (think think think.. research online).. "aha!! what about cake, cookies, sweets.. argh!! she's diabetic" (browse online for sugar-free cake/cookies delivery) "there! I found one.. "SEND SUGAR FREE CAKE ANYWHERE IN THE US - from Pakistan!" come on! seriously!? grrrr.." I was stuck, the 14th is as close as, 1+13, yeah 14 days before Valentine's day(how hard is that?) What am I gonna do now? For sure she wouldn't mind a simple "Happy Valentine's Day dear!! greeting" NO!! I want something special, it doesn't need to be the best but atleast special. O heavens I need a hand here? Kindly?" Like a flickering and nearly dying bulb, "FLOWERS" suddenly popped up..yeah! She's not a big fan of flowers.. but what the h***. I'll try my luck..

There's a lot of online florist - the hardest part is choosing which one is going to deliver what I expect a flower would be. For God knows how many more days I spent, reading blogs, checking reviews, customers comments. It seems, nearly all of them are disatisfied with the service and products they got.  It started to buffle me. Well, this is the only way. I successfully convinced my self to believe in a saying that goes "you cannot please everyone" so I continued. I am not a flower lover either but the pictures on the web were too fascinating. Just one more look, and I made up my mind.  I focused on one florist's website www.proflowers.com, still I had a humongous challenge.. "what flower should I give?". Oh, this is endless. Another day or two -flipping the webpages, downloading the pictures comparing the products.. Ok, lets get this over with! I finally placed an order for this Peruvian Lilies called 200 Blooms of Love, they're beautiful! Probem is it's just a photograph, anything can be done to make it look good (echoing in my head are the ranting disappointed customers).  Despite of all this, I took my chances. February 9th, everything is set - 200 Blooms of Love with Ruby Gathering(that's what the vase's called) to be delivered on the 13th, Monday. I've had it sent to her workplace(how I got the address? its a different story).

Delivery date, I was so excited and nervous at the same time, will my flowers find their way? Unexpected twist, she took a day off, she wasn't feeling well or was too tired after all the works last week(unfortunately she needed to work on the weekends). I almost lost my hopes. Night came, I saw a box on her bed, my spirit was lifted, the delivery was a success!! cheers to that! :) She silently and carefully unboxed it, arranged them in the vase - her smile, the smile on her face made everything worth it. My heart almost dance with gladness.

This is how it looked like out of the box

Second day, it started to bud and they're more alive.

Third, they're becoming more and more beautiful.

Fully bloomed on the fourth day.

Still blooming on its sixth.

Ninth day and it's still a beauty

This is the 200 Blooms of Love on its 11th day. Isn't it amazing?

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I really can't describe how happy I was and still am whenever I see the flowers in your room, blooming. I know in time, they will wither and you have to throw them away, but I will never forget how these flowers gave you a glow and painted a smile on your face. I am grateful that even if it's that simple, you aprreciated and loved it. I love you and thank you.
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'til the next one. :)

Love.. what a wonder

When you ask an individual "why do you love him/her" or "how do you know you love that person" you will end up getting the answer "uhm.. well.." or "I just know".. Oftentimes, you really can't get a straight answer... I too will fail if I am to be asked. Rarely(or not at all) can one describe how it feels like to be inloved.. You know its there but the moment you start putting it to words, it just never feel right. That feeling when your heart beats differently everytime you hear the name or whenever the person is near.. It's that glow in your eyes that can illuminate the whole world for seeing one single sweet smile.. its that chill and shiver (in a good way) brought by a thousand bolts of lightning when you touch.. its that warmth and comfort  when you two hug.. its the aroma of the kiss that is more intoxicating than whiskey.. its that calmness deep within that puts you in equilibrium like every piece finding its own place in a puzzle.. What an amazing and wondrous feeling.

When you find your true love, you can't see any other ray of light besides the one that leads you to this person. When you find your true love, you find your home.. your contentment.. your everything.. You'll realize that even if your life is not the best in this world, you'll feel the inner joy.. the eternal satisfaction.Once you find this soul, there is nothing you want to do but to continue living, grow old with him/her.. give all your love.. until you both shall live.

I Miss You..

          You looked so near, yet I cannot hold you. I can't feel your warmth.. I can't smell your scent.. I miss you..

          Staring at you this close on my screen without being able to embrace you torments me. But, it won't be long my love. Just another six months and you will be with me for good. We won't need to count anymore days, because everyday will become our day. For me, this time around is harder.. worse than I ever thought. But how diffucult is it to wait? I managed to make it through the first half, no reasons why I couldn't for the second. 

          Your silence is deafening. I don't know what's on your mind. Just the same, we don't really talk about our emotions.. We relay them in this manner.. chat.. text. Would you be very kind to tell me what you're thinking of? Things that bother you this very moment? You tried to smile.. but those eyes.. baby they are the window to your very soul. They project the grief and anxiety you have inside - I can see it.. :( How I wish I could do something. How I wish I could give a light to your darkened spirit.. but **SIGH** the lamp of my being isn't that bright to give you illumination. Please.. please find your self.. find your comfort and look forward to the end of this.. can you see that glow from a distance? that's the end of the tunnel.. we're almost there love.. this one year is almost over. just hold on tight.. hold my hands.. we will finish this chapter of our lives...

I Call Me The Blessed

          I am a plain and simple person. I don't ask much. I am contented with whatever there is. Thankful for every little thing that I find a blessing(may it be good or bad). I became older yesterday but for a consolation, you still are older than I am. And that is a fact that we will continue to live on for the rest of our lives.

          Allow me to say thank you. Thank you for making this the grandest birthday I ever had. Lucky is the word, but I would rather call me "THE BLESSED". Why? I have everything I needed.. I have everything I wanted for my special day. I know its a challenge for a family oriented  person just like you to trade special occasions - Christmas or New Year for a lesser significant one like my birthday. But that's what you did! You set aside the chance to be united with your love ones and have chosen to be with me instead. (my birthday isn't lesser significant after all)

          I couldn't thank you enough for going through all the troubles. I know you are tired,all the travels and other stuff but you didn't mind. You're supposed to be resting or be with your kins but you went the other way and gave a room for us to be together. You have no idea how wonderful it is, how great the feeling is for each moment that you're with me. Just the time alone.. ITS PRICELESS.. A gift that isn't comparable to anything. How I wish I can give you back all the joy and happiness you're giving. But I cannot. All I can do is pray and hope that God will handle it for me. Baby.. you make me feel like I'm the most blessed life-form on earth. I couldn't ask for more.. Eveything.. anything you give and do to me is a perfection.. You are the life of my life.. the breath that I breathe.. the water that sustains me. You are my world. my balance.. my infinity, my very own definition. my fulfillment.. I love you with every beat of my heart.. with all my heart... with all my soul. Please don't ever change.. Please don't ever leave me, if you possibly can?

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME.. :)

Hit Check... (How are we doing so far?)

We've been fearful of the day we have to part. Overly anticipating what and how it's going to be (you being away). We were clueless on how we can make it through..

It's almost 4 months, and how are we doing so far? I can say we are doing a very good job maintaining what we have (God bless the tech geniuses who made all these cyber communications possible). We talk, send messages and then talk again, every day.. We sleep on it and then talk again. Lately I have noticed, you were frequently asking if I'm getting tired of you or of what we do.. And I have the same answer to that my love... "NO". Are you? True, sometimes we don't have much of a topic for discussions anymore, you do your thing and I do mine, but having you on the othe side of the line makes me feel we're just hanging out not necessarily doing anything or talking about something in particular.. but close enough to feel your presence as if you're just beside me... like how we used to. I don't mind sitting here all day everyday until you finally come home. I don't fancy going out with friends or unwind and visit places if it's not you that I am with. You may not understand or know how it makes me feel but trully and honestly, it's becoming an obligation being with somebody that's not you. I can't enjoy anyone else's company especially when all I can think of is to get home and speak to you again. It may seem to you that I am deprived of having a normal life (I don't know what you mean though), but baby you are my life and you are giving a life to the life itself. I would want nothing more than to be with you.. spend all my time and the time after that with you. I don't have the looks, the guts or the wealth. I too am not the romantic guru type who can make you feel thrilled everytime.. and I can't offer you the world either as its not my possession. I can only give you my undying love and admiration to the best possible way I can.

People have different prospectives. Even if we complement each other and have a lot of traits in common, you may still see life, or spending life differently that I do. I don't own you, neither your life nor your time. Your heart and love is the only thing I can call my own. I'll do whatever it takes so noone can take it away from me.. Please let me keep that. I hope you won't get tired of me too. I hope you won't find me boring and repetetive. If so, please give me a hint as I don't even know what boring exactly means.

Long distance relationship really is a challenge. A lot of things may need to be set aside. Sacrifices may need to be offered. Life style may need to be changed. But above it all we should have the same goal, the same dream, the same direction. As it has been known, many failed but some people have survived. Those who succeeded had the best reward.. Its knowing that they found their one true love who is more than willing to go through hell to keep the love alive. Baby.. as early as now, I know we can make it... I know we can pull it through. I believe in you.. I trust what we have. Soon, we will meet again. Soon...